[12:52] Wits End

Yes, I am lost. I lost everything already. There's nothing for me to live on, nothing for me to get emotional for. I was really happy that I could actually help my bro get his work done on time, but worried that he would procrastinate and disappoint us again. I did my best, I hope you too bro. As I said, 'The results ain't important, the process is.' I won't regret putting so much efforts to help you even if you would still fail, as long as you also put in all you ever can.

I really can't cope any further. The pressure and fear, and the emotional break down have all become a daily routine. As I approached my pals and brothers, they have all their own lives to tread. I have a million things bugging me, killing my brain cells. The only thing left for me is my confidence. Unlike Ah Xiao whom I call FOC (Full-Of-Cock), I am so Full-Of-Confidence even when I know things ain't going my way. Besides god, who can help me?

I need to die. I really have to. For a thinker, a planner, an organiser, a perfectionist, and an idiot, living means nothing now. I really want to appreciate everything around me, but I don't have the rights now.